Cherry on Top!

But I would like to stay in another country, for probably several months? see and experience what it's like to live in other kind of environments with different cultures, foods, and with 4 types of seasons :") haa that would be really lovely. I would loveeeee to live in the UK, hopefully in Brighton where the UK youtube crew lives (sneaky!). Or maybe live in LA or San Fransisco. I don't know, things might not look the same as the things we used to see in videos, pictures and stuffs, but I'm up for some adventures! :) Ovan and I always dream about living in other country. Having different style of date should be very interesting. You know, like strolling around the parks, go to the zoo and of course the amusement park. It would be awesome to live with him in another country hehe. 

If we're talking about places I'd love to visit, well, there are tons of em! I would love to go to every Disneyland / worlds in the world. Go to LA & New York, go to six flags. Go to Italy and VISIT GREECE!!! Go to Paris and experience Paris Fashion Week.

XOXO,

nna

XOXO,

nna

   I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
   Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
   She's confident
   Got a laser eye
   Swinging to her own beat
   an A+ smile
   She's a winner

5. Taking Over Me (Acoustic) - Lawson

    If I close my eyes

   Caught in a moment
   We lived and we loved
   And we hurt and we jumped

8. Fall Into The Sky - Zedd ft. Ellie Goulding

    My heart is heavy
   Takes me to a place I can’t breathe
  

9. Rumour Has It - Adele

    She ain't gonna be able to love you like I will,
   She is a stranger,
   You and I have history,
   Or don't you remember?

10. Enchanted - Taylor Swift

      Please don't be in love with someone else

XOXO,

nna :)

Well, my first love is my boyfriend, since he's my first (ever) serious relationship. I had an ex from awkward middle school phase though, it was, no joke, one of the thing I regret the most in my life -_-" oh well. How do I know that he's my first love? Since when? well, it didn't just happen. Like even in the first month, it didn't feel serious at all. But then things started to feel, hmm I don't know, a bit deeper I guess? I feel like the relationship that I'm having with him is something that's worth fighting for. Like I would do anything to try to understand him, his conditions, his circumstances, his strength and weakness and try to accept it, not because I want something in return, but because I realize that I truly care about him. It's like I might be happy living all by myself, but it wouldn't feel complete without him. I've never felt that way before because I'm a pretty ignorant lady. Although I still make mistakes (until this day) and sometimes said the wrong words, I do love him. I know that it's not just a crush. It feels like, kalo in bahasa, MENGASIHI not MENCINTAI. I don't know if it's just me, but I can feel the difference.

Sometimes people say that if we love someone, we should let them be themself and accept them for who they are, even when they have bad habits & characters, which is TRUE. But I learn from him that we do should accept our partner as who they are, but we also should make them be the best they can be, including trying to bring out the good character and get rid of the bad ones. It might not be an instant process but it's worth the try. It's not about not accepting the other's bad side, but it's about trying to make them a better person. Because that's what he do to me, I used to be such a careless girl and I was very clumsy and can't even take care of myself. I always feel insecure and ugly and I didn't believe in myself. But know, I can handle things on my own, I could pay attention to my surroundings and protect myself from harm, and I know that I'm loved :) 

My first kiss was also with him, which was kinda happen unplanned. Like seriously I didn't mean to do it (yes, I was the one who kissed him, but it was an accident!!! *self defense*). I was going to kiss his cheek when we were watching a film, it was dark, okay? I couldn't really see him. I kissed him and then he said 'Did you really just kissed my lips or what?' with a confused face (but I can see the fishy smile dude, pfft so obvious). I was really embarrased and I can't even see his face. END OF STORY. And NO I am not the kind of girl who has the guts to do first moves. NO NO NO. Pls don't judge, nonetheless, I have no regrets. It's pretty funny looking back at that moment now :)

XOXO,

nna

I might not know what will happen in the future. But I am not worried :) I know it's going to be great and wonderful and awesome. 

XOXO,

nna

Hello, I believe I'm a day behind with this 30 blogposts challenge because I don't feel like blogging yesterday, I'm sorry about that. But I'll make it up to you guys and am catching up today :)

Well, english has always been one of the subjects I truly care about and deeply love, therefore english is my ultimate forte when it comes to subjects in school. Having high grades was not really my intentions though, I'm very interested in speaking english on daily basis, it becomes my habit and I can say that I'm better than some of the kids because I could speak fluently and I have pretty wide vocabularies. But I have to admit I'm not the 'grammar lady', I still make (lots of) mistakes. Thanks to lots of years spending time on watching tvs and films in english and reading books. 

On our last year of highschool, we went through national final exam (UN) and school's final exam (US) which had english subject in it. I was one of the two students with top score on school's english final exam (only US but not with UN). Like seriously it was the most satisfying moment in my life. Not because I could do the test myself, but because God knows I really put my heart and passion when it comes to english subject and He helped me throughout my entire final exam, especially english. Eventhough I'm not the highest in my overall final exams grades, I'm very happy with my english grades. It's like I may not be the best in every subjects, not that kind of 'smart' smart, but I know english is my forte, it's my strength and people can see that it's in my blood. For once, I'm not a mediocre but I'm at the top. And I'm very grateful to have such an awesome God who would help me to reach the top and be the best. 

When my dad congratulated me, I saw the proud smile on his face. It was undescribable :") and hearing what I said to him, which is 'to God be the glory pa :)' drew an even bigger smile. I know that depending on God rather than being smart is more important to our family and our value. I couldn't feel more proud, grateful, and satisfied with the path I've chosen. 

XOXO,

nna

Stop all criticism. Criticsm never changes a thing. Accept yourself as you are. Everybody changes, and when you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are positive.

Don't scare yourself. Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. Find a mental image that gives you pleasure and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought.

Be gentle, kind and patient. Be gentle with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn the new ways of thinking.

Praise yourself. Criticism breaks down the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Tell yourself how well you're doing with every little thing. 

Support yourself. Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. It shows strength to ask for help.

Be loving to you negatives. Acknowledge that you created them to fulfill a need. As you find new, positive ways to fulfill those needs, you can release the old negative patterns.

Take care of your body. Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise can you enjoy? Cherish and revere the person you are.

Mirror work. Look into your eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself while looking into the mirror. Talk to your parents looking into the mirror. Forgive them too. At least once a day say "I love you"

Do it now. Don't wait until you get well, or lose the weight, or get the new job, or the new relationship. Begin now - do the best you can.

Aquarius' Likes:

• Fame
• Themselves
• Privacy
• Dreams
• Magic
• Change
• Eccentricity
• Surprises
• Living within their means

• Emotions
• Intimacy
• Show offs
• Taken for granted
• Being 'pinned down'
• Violence
• Senseless extravagance

Hmm well, I don't really get these things and they don't interest me, but some of them are true to facts I guess. What I know for sure is I do dislike emotions (getting controlled by my own emotions) but I do like intimacy :):)

XOXO,

nna

This is the post I'm most excited about and I have prepared and put lots of thoughts for my 30 facts. Even if nobody's going to care and read my post, I just love doing lists and I've been waiting for the perfect moment to list some facts about myself since those '50 facts about me' video is being so hyped up on youtube. So here it goes, the 30 interesting facts about ME! :D

XOXO,

nna

I never thought about ending my life ._. I wanna live, I don't want to dissappear and just do nothing. Suicide is ridiculous, it's not a good way to die, it's a sin, you will not go to heaven by ending your own life. so NO! HELL NO! I would neverrr!!!!

Even if bad things are happening, even when I'm going through hard and tough times, I will not end my own life. My life is not even mine, it's HIS. I don't have the right to end what's not mine. That's why being grateful is such an important thing in life. That way, you'll live more positively, when you're feeling sad, lonely, desperate, you'll know that God is always watching over you. What's the point of ending life anyway? It's stupid and it disrespects God's plan for your life. So if you ever have the thoughts about ending your life, pls think about it and rather than being sad and pathetic, take some time and pray. Things will be better and if you end your life, you will not be able to see it :) HAVE FAITH!

Hi guys, I nearly forgot about this whole 30 blogposts challenge thing, I was about to go to sleep when I realized I haven't written today's post ._. I'm feeling pretty sleepy right but I don't want to miss a single post, I'll try my best but maybe I'll use bahasa here and then hehe :)

Well from my point of view, religion doesn't have the same meaning as BELIEFS. Religion terkesan agak-agak agamawi, kalo di Kristen tuh namanya taurat banget. Religion ibarat cuma status di KTP, lo punya agama but who could ever guarantee that you're living the life your God wants you to live. Not just living with the Dos and Don'ts, but living with a purpose and calling. 

I may not be the most perfect person ever according to HIM, but who is? Satu hal yang gw percaya, gw diciptain dengan tujuan, dengan purpose dan calling, dipanggil untuk beritakan keselamatan ke seluruh bangsa, no matter how hard it will be, no matter what kind of risks it'll give me. As far as I now, it's one of the hardest thing karena kalo lo melakukannya ga pake hati, without PASSION, tanpa hati yang berapi-api menjerit buat lawatan, ga ada gunanya, ga ada artinya. It'll bring people to Him tapi kita malah bisa luput dari perkenanan dan ga dianggap lagi :( that's why it's not the easiest thing to do karena ga cuma bisa dibuktiin dari action but yet the simplest thing karena cuma butuh kemauan dari hati lo dan penyerahan penuh sama Tuhan.

The second thing I believe that my whole life is a gift and a grace from Him. Semua pencapaian yang udah gw lakuin, everything I've received and gift to others, it's not mine, it's Him. I don't own anything in the world. Without Him life would be meaningless, we might feel happy but it's just temporary. 

Third thing is bukan cuma sama manusia yang punya relationship, tapi sama Tuhan juga :) one of the greatest feelings in my life adalah bisa ngerasain yang namanya dipeluk sama Tuhan. I really love HUGS, so to feel His warmth is just wonderful and undescribably beautiful. Sama Tuhan itu bisa ngerasain kasih sayang dari Bapak, sebagai mempelai dan kekasih hidup, sebagai guru, sebagai sahabat dan itu yang bikin punya relationship sama Tuhan rasanya special banget. He's the One I could trust the most, He's the One would be there for me through the good and the bad, He's the One who loves me when I'm feeling worthless, insecure and anxious. 

HUA pokoknya sayang banget sama Tuhan Yesus :) He's the love of my life, I wouldn't trade Him for treasures or gold or riches untold. I may not look like the most religious person ever on social media, but I do love my dear Jesus and loving Him is the greatest thing in my life :)

My favorite verses at the moment:

But because God was so gracious, so very generous, here I am. And I’m not about to let his grace go to waste. Haven’t I worked hard trying to do more than any of the others? Even then, my work didn’t amount to all that much. It was God giving me the work to do, God giving me the energy to do it. So whether you heard it from me or from those others, it’s all the same: We spoke God’s truth and you entrusted your lives. - 1 Corinthians 15:10

XOXO,

nna

Drugs stopped me being a son, a brother, a bestfriend and the love of someone else. Drugs stopped me being alive.

Well, I don't even want to talk about drugs. All I know is it's a very bad bad thing, it'll give you nothing but bad effects & concequences, it's pretty expensive (some of 'em), it'll waste your money, it's not good for your health. Like c'mon, if you're so stressful or got into a state of deep depression, there's a lot of things that you can do other than drugs okay? Using drugs won't make you look cool, it's even the OPPOSITE of cool. I don't like 'em, don't even want to try 'em, it ain't worth it. It's against the law, it's not allowed to be consumed no matter what your belief is. Some of them might say 'well, you're going to die anyway' but I still disagree with the idea of using drugs. I don't think death because of using drugs is something you would be proud of. 

Now, about alcohol, I'm not ashamed and won't try to hide the facts that I've had some kind of alcohol beverages or whatsoever. Not going to lie, some of it does taste good, like beers, vodka, and wine is my favorite alcohol among all. I'm not the type of person who would drink to try to get rid of the bad stuffs in their life or to use it as an escapism, I've never been drunk. I only drink in special occasion, I don't even drink the whole bottle of it when I'm hanging out with friends who would drink beer and alcoholic stuffs as a part their lifestyle, but I do take one sip or two. It does taste good actually, but I can't drink the entire bottle / glass. And as far as I know, wine is actually good for your health and using some type of alcohol would make food taste more delicious especially when it comes to baking & roasting. Consuming too many alcohol won't do you anygood, you'll get addicted and it would be hard to stop the bad habit. But I think it's okay to drink alcohol occasionally, I guess.

XOXO,

nna

HELLO! 

Well, 3yrs ago I met this guy and eventually fell in love with him, he's my fellow classmate in sophomore year of highschool. So this is my first (ever) serious relationship with a guy. Well, it feels awesome to have someone who would be there for you and I'm so grateful for it, but it also takes a lot of work and time to understand the other person, to fully accept and know his behaviour and habits and the way he thinks. A relationship don't just happen and I think it requires some effort :) and I'm glad I found someone who wouldn't easily give up on me.

Sometimes people mistakenly see us as siblings, which is quite funny. I feel content when I'm with him, like I'm able to be myself. I could sing and shout any song, talk in english and sometimes with british accent, eat lots lots of food, which is always a plus. We've been through ups and downs too, but it made us who we are now, it builds the character and make us understand more about each other. There were times when we used to argue a lot over things that weren't so important back then. Now, we could laugh at how childish we used to be. It might not be easy but it's not that hard either, if that makes sense.

Being in a different university environment is also a challenge. Having different kind of friends, jokes, and different schedule and routines. Not being able to see each other as often as it used to be led to some argument. But we have overcome those issues and things are a lot better now.