Cherry on Top!

I hate those words. I really really hate them. When your dark past hits you like a ton of red bricks. You're trying to forget, you're trying to forgive. Say to yourself that it doesn't matter anymore, whatever happened back then, you can't change it, no matter how hard you try. But those words still hunt me like crazy. They are bloody annoying. I try to not make them get me. I try hard. But still, I feel pissed at myself for not making the right choice back then. For letting myself gave into him. For letting myself surrendered that time. I wish I didn't. I wish I knew that if I do it, I could see the consequences that I will have. I should've known that. How stupid was I?! It was too good to be true. If I just said no, if I just refuse, if I didn't fall into his crappy trap, things wouldn't end up like this. I wouldn't end up feeling like this. He wouldn't end up acting like this. I made the worst mistake in my life. Do you get my point?   Well, my point is, I miss you. and I wish we didn't make that mistake.